2020 Election

Rudy Giuliani Sweats Off Hair Dye As He Presents Unfounded Claims Of ‘Election Fraud’ At Press Conference

On Thursday, President Donald Trump‘s personal attorney Rudy Giuliani claimed that he had witnesses and evidence to support the president’s election fraud theory. He referenced My Cousin Vinnie as he made his wild allegations, but he refused to disclose any names because it “put his witnesses’ lives at risk.”

The former New York City mayor delivered his speech at the Republican National Committee headquarter to a large crowd of reporters. The last time Giuliani spoke at a press conference was when the Trump campaign mistakenly booked Four Seasons Total Landscaping as their site instead of Four Seasons Hotel in Philadelphia for a press conference last week.

Giuliani claimed he worked with an “elite strike-force team working on behalf of the president” to present a conspiracy theories involving Venezuela, China, the Clinton Foundation, “hack” judges and trucks full of ballots.

When asked to present more evidence on the case, the “strike-force team” leader Jenna Ellis responded, “Your question is fundamentally flawed when you’re asking where is the evidence.”

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Following up, Giuliani asked, “Did you all see My Cousin Vinny?”

“These people were further away than My Cousin Vinny was from the witness,” he added.

He attempted to argue the point that election observers were standing too far away to oversee the whole process of ballot counting.

While the attorney was speaking, two streaks of brown hair dye trickled down his face which went unnoticed by those around him.

Fion Huang

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